Movin’!

Hello Everyone,

I am officially moving to tumblr to host my blog. The formatting is easier to use and there is a larger audience of fat friendlies and fatties there.  I hope you will help me by making the leap to fis4feminism.tumblr.com.

Thanks!

F is for frilly, fat panties!

It’s not a secret that a lot of fat ladies who have not been introduced to the world of fat positivity really, really, really hate shopping for underwear.  Actually some very enlightened fat positive souls feel the same way!  Buying underwear can be hard for anyone. After all, it is the most intimate apparel we own. It has to be sexy, functional, fun, empowering, and comfortable and that can be hard.

Fat women especially feel that they are left with few options.  We seem to be torn between granny panties and a nice cotton brief because anything else either doesn’t come in our size or doesn’t fit right.  Few companies cater to our large curves and if they do, they don’t do it right.

I’ve found, personally, a few brands that might help my fellow fatties find comfort in their most intimate apparel.  First up, Cacique.

Now I know I’ve been talking about Lane Bryant quite a bit lately, but I truly feel that their Cacique line of bras and panties is particularly fat-friendly and worth a try for any lady who had felt like her panties aren’t fitting quite right.

They have a huge selection from quant and simple cotton briefs in solids or fun patterns.

I wear fun briefs when I’m running to the store or wearing a particularly nice dress (as I usually wear spanx to avoid chub rub) so that they don’t ride up.  Cacique carries both high waisted and low waisted briefs. I would recommend going up a size if you are used to panties that have a little more stretch and roominess to them.  I just ordered a few pairs during the 5 for $25 sale and went to size 26 instead of 22/24 and they are incredibly comfortable and durable.

I am a huge fan of lace myself and I also ordered both a lacy pair of briefs and a half thong totally in lace.  I am AMAZED at how well the lace withstands me pulling and pushing it around. I have heard a complaint that the crotch hangs low in lace boyshorts, but I have a long waist so that hasn’t been an issue for me.  Just a head’s up.

 

It seems some of the most popular items right now are the tangas and the boyshorts. When I was in they were in short supply so you might have better luck online with them.  The tangas seem to sit at the right place, don’t gap and don’t ride up.  The boyshorts don’t roll or fold on you like a lot of other brands (read: Victoria’s Secret) and come in everything from solids to polka dots to holiday themes. Great for under a big flannel shirt around the house, though I tend to wear Bear’s boxer briefs 🙂

 

Lane Bryant isn’t the only place to get great, comfy panties for a plus size booty.  I have had a great deal of luck with Torrid where you can find some great garter boyshorts and briefs, fun prints and sexy lacy bits.

Surprisingly, for the frugal fashionista, there are some great options at Target and Walmart.  I am partial to Hanes at Walmart and their multipacks usually contain 3-7 pairs depending on the cut and style.  Their nylon blend boyshorts in fun prints run about $8.00 but are a staple in my wardrobe and very comfortable.  Be careful with sizing, though. They tend to run a tad big.  I’m absolutely in love with Gillian and  O’Malley, a Target brand of panties. They are as varied as the stuff you can find in a nicer store and usually pretty cheap.  Check often for sales and clearance panties. Their sizes run up to a xxxl in some styles and range from lace boyshorts to lace paneled briefs to cotton thongs in every color.  Sizes are pretty spot on, but some prints seem to not look good when stretched out so give them a tug before putting them in your cart!

F is for F That!

It’s rare I have a rant against the FA community itself. The Fat Acceptance community have fought the good fight so that I could start to love myself and see myself as worthy of the confidence that other women who wear straight sizes are afforded without society batting an eyelash at them.  But recently there have been a handful of individuals within the FA community who have really challenged me to think hard about what it means to be a size-positive feminist.

These are the women who post snarky comments on weight loss blogs targeted at other women or who constantly and often judgmentally challenge women who are not comfortable with their bodies and seek to lose weight for whatever reason.  Where do we draw the line between hating on the woman and hating on the system?

In my opinion at least, is that we should respect the wishes of any woman who seeks to lose weight. Now, that seems kind of counter intuitive until I explain the grand master plan.  We can’t fight other women into seeing things our way.  Putting on the boxing gloves to challenge women to a fight they never asked for is going to chase them away from the cause and leave them more hurt and confused than allowing them to carry out their perhaps misguided plan. Instead of attacking the women who are simply repeating a learned habit, we should be attacking the foundations on which their motives are based.  That means doing things as simple as being confident, radient, fat women in the presence of adversity or as complicated as becoming a political advocate or working with non-profit empowerment organizations (or even creating our own!)

 

Giveaway!

Wonderful people!  I am doing a giveaway this holiday season!  I’ve got a $25 Lane Bryant gift card for a random lucky reader.  Use this gift card at Cacique, Catherines, or Lane Bryant to buy anything from nightwear and bras to beautiful work clothes and dresses.  To enter:

1. Tell me in the comments what your favorite winter outfit is!

AND

2. Reblog one of my posts

OR

3. Subscribe

OR

4. Post a link to my site on facebook saying why you want to win this prize!

This giveaway will close on Jan. 5th so enter soon!

 

F is for Fashion (Lust List)

After a nice evening out Bear took me to a small Goodwill to do a little thrifting before heading home.  I looked, with no success, in the plus section and decided to check the men’s section for some comfy sweaters.  Sure enough, just as I gave up I spied the John Goodman flannel I had been hunting for.  A xxl tall men’s green plaid flannel shirt.  Obviously worn in, I was so ecstatic I bought it without even trying it on thinking I would need to belt it and wear it with some leggings.  When I got home and tried it on I discovered it wasn’t too big at all, just barely covering my bum!

Sexy, right?

Of course that means I am on the prowl for something new!  I have seen some stunning plus size tutus on other blogs and I just had to do some online “window shopping” to see if I could find one to make my own!

This tutu skirt is made by Etsy artist kovale.  It is absolutely stunning!  A white tutu lies under a netted, feather top layer.  The price is steep but I can dream about twirling around in this lovely skirt! Sizes range from xl to xxxl and up and need to br pre-ordered so keep that in mind!

Okay maybe this qualifies more as a petticoat than a tutu, but the color is stunning and the layer look would be modest enough to wear without a skirt over it.  I hope this tutu is every bit as bouncy as it looks!  I would love to wear it with my blue and white striped cardigan or a cute, lacy cami.  You can get your own here for $32 and size go up to size 20.

Okay, maybe not really a skirt, but this tutu dress from Asos Curve.  Sizes 18-22, this dress can be worn with a glittery bolero or red cardigan for christmas parties. The best part, it’s on sale now!

Alright, alright I got terribly distracted but this high waisted skirt by StarChic just needed to be on my lust list for sure. I would be willing to splurge $60 for this velvet red skirt (POCKETS!) Yes, yes a thousand times yes please! I think it would look just as great with a silky black shirt and some dark tights to warm up in the cold Wisconsin winter!

What’s for dinner?

Steak and potato salad is the best of two worlds.  You get the cool taste of a salad and the heartiness of a meat and potato dinner.  This is a great way to get some greens if you aren’t too keen on eating “bunny food”.  Of course, if you aren’t a fan or red meat you can always substitute turkey or chicken!  This is an at-home version of Applebee’s version.

2 8oz. sirloin steak

8 c. baby spinach

6 small red or yellow potatoes

2 large tomatoes

1/2 large red onion

2 hardboiled eggs

Italian dressing

 

Marinade

1/4 cup olive oil

1/4 c. balsamic vinegar

1/8 c. wocestershire sauce

1/8 c. soy sauce

2 tspn. dijon mustard

2 tspn. minced garlic

dash of salt and pepper

 

Mix all marinade ingredients in large zip lock bag. Add steaks and refrigerate, turning occasionally for at least 2 hours.  Grill steaks on grill or heat a large skillet over medium-high heat and cook until center is warm, but pink (for medium rare).  Meanwhile, boil potatoes until soft in center.  Chop steak, potato, tomato, onion and egg into 1/2 in. pieces and toss with spinach and italian dressing.  Serves 2.

 

 

F is for Fashion!

More pleats today. It may have snowed a few days ago, but it is all gone now and a balmy 40 degrees outside; basically summer for a true Wisconsinite!  I went to Burlington Coat Factory yesterday. I haven’t stopped in there since I was young and my mom couldn’t find a girl’s coat to fit over my rotund little belly!  But, damn, do they have great prices! My natural instinct is to still shop clearance, despite the prices being so cheap. I caved and bought a new winter coat at full price for (wait for it) TWENTY DOLLARS!!  Wow, I’ve never found a good dress coat for less than 150 and since I am wide in the hips and smaller in the waist most fitted coats don’t fit me well anyways.  It’s a 3xl from Miss London, a company I have never heard of and can’t seem to find a site for.  It’s very similar to a tan wool peacoat, but a tad lighter. Fully lined and everything, too.  It seems like a regular item so if you are interested I would head on over and get your own! They have coats that come in larger sizes too, so if you are looking for a cute winter coat I would recommend you checking out Burlinton Coat Factory.

Not this exact coat. Think smaller gold buttons and wooly material. Source: Burlington Coat Factory

The other item I bought was this faux leather stretch belt with a nice gold medallion on the front. I didn’t own a brown belt and I needed something to wear with a few dresses and skirts I owned. It screamed country chic to me so I picked it up for only $7.  Bear told me it really helps this outfit look awesome!

This skirt is proof of my theory that no matter where you end up in your shopping trip: TRY ON EVERYTHING. Well, okay, not quite. I was at a Goodwill in Madison and they have weird dressing rooms so I don’t try on things there. The doors start about a foot off the ground and are about 4.5 ft tall leaving about 6 inches of my face staring out into the shopping area. The one time I tried things on a LOT of men walked by and tried to nonchalantly look over. Nope.  So from there on out I just eyeballed things. This was an eyeball success!

Skirt: size 14, $2.99 Goodwill

Shirt: size xxl, $5.00 Target

Belt: size xl, $6.99 Burlington Coat factory

Also, proof that I do, in fact, have a face. I am tall and since I take photos on the computer I often can’t fit my head in or it’s blurry.  So, proof.

F is for FAQ!

I’ve had some questions lately about myself and my opinions on certain topics. Hopefully this post will clarify a few things for my lovely readers.

Q: What size are you?

A: This is probably my most commonly asked question and I understand why. I am a US size 24/26 on bottom and 16/18 on top.  Of course, my closet is packed with clothes from medium to xxxxl and size 10-26.  I’m sure you all know that women’s clothing is terribly sized. One company’s small is another companies xxxs or xxxl!

Q: Where do you shop?

A: Almost strictly thrift stores.  Goodwill, St. Vinnie’s, Salvation Army, and a few one of a kind shops.  When I do shop retail I stick to places that cater to a range of sizes, even when shopping for shoes or accessories.  I try not to give my money to fatphobic companies.  So, Lane Bryant, Torrid, JCPenny, Maurices and Deb.  Occasionally, I will shop on Amazon, the Bettie Page Store, or a few other places.

Q: Do you have any general tips for plus size women looking to dress for x,y, or z occasion?

A: Wear what makes you feel confident. You can’t enjoy yourself if you are focused on what you look like to others.  If that means you wear big horizontal stripes, short shorts, a miniskirt or a boxy shirt then so be it!

Q: Where are you from?  What do you do?

A: These questions always come together for some reason.  I am from a small town in Wisconsin.  I am taking a break from my four year liberal arts college and trying to get sick of adult life enough to come back 🙂  I am currently on a job hunt.  My areas of interest are women’s and gender studies, transitioning families, and writing.

Q: How do you deal with fatphobic people or hate mail on your blog?

A: The same way I do in real life: ignore them.  Reacting gives them power and since I don’t trust myself to set the best example for the fat-o-sphere community (I am a crass woman) I tend to just move on.  My stance is that their comments say more about them than me.  If anything, I feel pity for them.

Q: What is your favorite article of clothing?

A: Currently my red circle dress featured on my blog! But I’m sure it will be something new next week 🙂

Q: Can I submit pictures or opinions to you for your blog?

A: Of course! I would love to feature your pictures, articles or opinions.  Send them to me at powersm@beloit.edu.

F is for fashion!

Suspenders!  I love, love, love suspenders. On jeans, shorts, a-line skirts, pencil skirts, etc.  I found my love of suspenders through other fashion blogs and I just can’t get enough. The great thing about them is that they are commonly found abandoned ay your local Goodwill or other thrift store for just a few dollars.  Another great thing about them: they fit all sizes! I’ve never found a pair that don’t fit and I am 5′ 11″.  Maybe I don’t use them for their intended purpose, but I do enjoy the way they look. And a pair on a man….purrrrrrr.

Let me explain the photos below. I had Bear the Boyfriend take these. He insisted on taking them while I was a) trying to put my shoe on and b) making a stupid ass face. But you know what, whatever. You get the picture 😉

Everything is from Goodwill. A whole outfit for under $20.00!

F is for Fun!

Today I was out getting Seamus T. Dog a haircut with Bear the Boyfriend and I stopped into a few shops. At one, I overheard an employee chatting up a customer and say, “Ugh. It’s really hard when you get off at 6 because then you have to rush home so you can work out. I don’t want to work out.  I’m sooo tired!”  At that point I had skirted away to another part of the store as to not be rude (also hearing diet talk is tough for me and it was inevitable based on context clues that is where this one was going).  It left a bad taste in my mouth though.

I, personally, believe that for my body exercise of certain varieties is very comforting.  This includes yoga, pilates, walking, swimming and playing badminton or occasionally volleyball.  Some chubby women enjoy running, skating, gentle stretches, low or high impact sports, etc. Cool.  And other women find exercise of any kind distasteful, painful, boring, or a chore.

To all women, chubby or not, I pose a question: Why are you doing something you don’t enjoy every single day when you have a choice not to do it?  I suppose the answer might be that a woman doesn’t have a choice. She doesn’t want to be fat or die young or lose her muscle.  They say that exercise isn’t meant to be enjoyed. It’s a means to an end.

I say, exercise is meant to be enjoyed. It is meant to make us feel good, before we do it, while we do it and after we do it.

That doesn’t mean that women who don’t enjoy running should just stop exercising all together.  Running isn’t the only exercise out there (contrary to what many former fatties trying to convince you to join them on the lighter side of life my say).  Nor does it mean that women who don’t exercise should never give it a try (if they felt so inclined to try in the first place).   I’m simply saying, if you don’t enjoy what you are doing: stop! Try something new. Try something you would never find yourself enjoying.  I only learned that I enjoyed pilates after my mom lent me a tape on the basics.  I watched my sister do yoga every morning in college, too self-conscious to ever bother to join her, until I did some online research and learned a few poses in my cluttered dorm room.

Of course, many women will continue to drag themselves to the gym until they get lazy, or something happens in their lives to give them an excuse to quit, or they injure themselves and never really make it back.  It’s not because they are not good enough or thin enough or talented enough for the gym. It’s because at the core of their being, they hate what they are doing. They listen to a woman on a talk show who has lost 150 lbs and she tells them that she loved to swim or run or walk or play raquetball after the first few weeks and that is how she lost the weight. Then we turn off our tvs and tell ourselves we are that woman and we will love a sport or exercise after the first few weeks. When we don’t; we adapt the all or nothing mentality.  Few of us dare to try something new or different or outside of our comfort zone.  So we resign ourselves to one of two options: we are the girl in the retail store dismally anticipating our evening run or we stop exercising at all.

But do we have to be one of those two people? Or can we be someone else? Can we be the ones who when faced with unhappiness try something new?  I challenge you to give it a try!